a whole year?

I'm so sorry. I've been so busy with myspace now. haha I guess everything changes, right? well I don't know what to say.. I guess when I wrote all these quotes I was in a little bit of a stressful time. I got this guy now that I love but he doesn't love me back. and for all of you that have ever been there, it's the hardest thing you can ever go through. it's hard to wake up every morning feeling hopeless; because you know the love of your life is waking up loving the wrong person. but hoping they still find happiness; even if it's not with you.

So here it is. An update. For all of you that still care haha.
myspace- www.myspace.com/shayyy16

And that's what you get for falling again. You can never get him outta your head. And there's something about you that makes me fall in love every time. Don't look at me like that. I don’t feel like falling for you all over again. I can't afford the heartbreak. Every time I think of you I fall for you all over again and at this rate I'll never be standing again. Everyone says you fall in love once but that's not true. Every time I hear your voice I fall in love all over again. I couldn't try to count all the times you hurt me and made me cry. I remember nights I couldn’t sleep because I didn’t wanna see you in my dreams. Just recently, I remembered why and how you made me laugh and I can't recall why I fell so hard for you the first time. But if you make sure this time will be worth my heartbreak I might just take that risk again. I don’t wanna like you, I don’t wanna care, cuz every time I do I end up worse than I've ever felt before but then there's something about you that's so irresistible. I feel you and that's not a good thing. I hate how I don’t talk to you for like a month and then all of a sudden you start talking to me again like nothing happened and I fall into your trap again all because you said my name. I hate how we don't talk for weeks but then all of a sudden you talk to me again and it's as if nothing happened and I slowly start falling for you all over again. I knew this wouldn't be easy but I never thought you'd leave me, not now, not ever. I always thought we'd be together but now I know it was too good to be true so why do I keep falling for you? I know it's been awhile but I think we need to talk. You see, I'm falling again. I never thought that this could happen, that I could ever feel this way again. I know it's kinda dumb but it doesn't matter. I can't hold it in. I told myself I would never like you again but every time I talk to you, I see that smile and those pretty eyes and I realize I just can't get over this guy no matter how hard I try. I told myself I wouldn’t fall for a guy again but I guess I was wrong, really wrong, cuz one look at you and I fell harder than I've ever fell in my entire life. I was feeling totally over him. I told myself it was a stupid crush, over, done with, but then he looked at me. Inside I built a wall so high around my heart I thought I would never fall. One touch and you brought it down. The bricks of my defenses scattered on the ground. And I swore to myself I wasn’t gonna love again. The last time was the last time I would let someone in. I'll never forget how for just one moment we had it all. I'm just speaking from experience. Nothing can compare to your first true love. So I hope this will remind you when it's real it's forever so don't forget about us. I'm on my knees. Only memories are left for me to hold. I'm still walking down memory lane cuz I know I'll be running into you. Maybe you'll remember me. Never forget what he meant to you but never let him know you remember. No matter what happens or how much time goes by I could never forget the first time you looked at me and I fell in love with your eyes. Now every other man I see reminds me of the one man who disappointed me. Our eyes collided and I saw exactly who I used to be. Our memories are like mix tapes - they sing me to sleep every night. Poets often describe love as an emotion that we can't control, one that overwhelms logic and common sense. That's what it was like for me. I didn't plan on falling in love with you and I doubt if you planned on falling in love with me. But once we met, it was clear that neither of us could control what was happening to us. We fell in love despite our differences and once we did, something rare and beautiful was created. For me, love like that has happened only once and that's why every minute we spent together has been saved in my memory. I'll never forget a single moment of it.